This is my laptop; there are many like it, but this one is mine. My laptop is my best friend; it is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. Without me, my laptop is useless; without my laptop, I am useless. I must write surreally. I must write more revolutionary than my contemporaries who are trying to slaughter my poetry and memoir. I must out wit them before they out wit me. I will ... My laptop and I know that what counts in writing is not the nouns we pick, the adjectives we use, nor the adverbs we interject. We know that it is the verb that counts. We will verb... My laptop is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother; I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its parts, its accessories, its dictionaries and thesauruses. I will keep my laptop clean, charged, and ready, even as I am clean, charged, and ready. We will become part of each other. We will … Before God, I swear this creed. My laptop, my rifle, and I are the defenders of our God and country. We are the masters of our enemy, but Christ is the savior of our lives.
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